Before I Left

Amandaline lays on the musty couch

Paler, thinner, weaker than usual.

She wears an itchy, wool winter cap she always said she hated.

Although it’s blue. Just like her eyes.

I try to chat to her at first, but after no response,

Momma comes over.

Baby, let your sister rest.

I try to refuse, but it’s no use.

She leads me to the back door.

Opens it with a Whapop

And nudges me out into the blazing summer sun.

Go play. I’ll call you when it’s time to come in.

Shielding my eyes, I glance around the yard.

Mostly grass and an uneven white fence around the yard.

A tree is planted in one corner.

Wild flowers sprout up here and there.

I stand under the looming oak tree,

Providing shade from the burning sun.

A rope swing hangs from a lower branch

Amandaline and I tied it up a while back.

I haven’t sat on it in forever.

The swing groans as it supports my weight.

A minute later the back door Whapops.

Eli trudges outside, grumbling to himself.

With a sigh, he rolls onto the grass.

Mom send you out here?

He nods, mutely.

Eli and I don’t do much outside.

alternating between laying in the grass

and sitting on the swing.

Listening to the birds sing

Watching the sticky, summer breezes rustle the leaves

Shaking the branches

like the illness that shook our family.

Eventually, the door Whapops

Mom pokes her head out.

Y’all can come back in.

Without saying a word,

Eli and I run back into the house.

Amandaline lays on the couch,

Just like before I left.  

~

I managed to text green bean for 2 hours last night.

I may die now.